ü Your mailman is terrified, and walks with a distinct limp
ü There are a very few places where you're still allowed to purchase produce
ü On more than one occasion you've returned from your lunch break with your dress on backwards
ü You send naked pictures of yourself… with your Christmas cards
ü Your number is written on the Men's Room walls of every bar in town. You know because you wrote it there
ü You can't wait for your wife to hit the campaign trail again
ü You've been the subject of no less than 42 "Letters To Penthouse"
ü You will respond to any of the following pet names: "Baby," "Hot Stuff," or "Hey You"
ü Every guy you know falls into one of two categories: "Would Do 'Em," or "Did 'Em"
ü UPS drivers fight over who gets to make deliveries to your house
ü Jehovah's Witnesses fight over who gets to visit your house
ü You can undress and re-dress in the time it takes most people to vote
ü Your showerhead has a name
ü You've received numerous "Cease and Desist" letters from Larry King because of obscene phone calls
ü Your vibrator has a car adapter
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